SpiritFarmer


I am so not cool
June 2, 2009, 8:47 pm
Filed under: culture, media, music

Working with a bunch of college students gives me the frequent opportunity to realize that I’m out of touch.  Whether it’s the movies I haven’t seen, or the music I haven’t heard, I know I’m behind the curve.  That’s o.k., though.  I think God gave me a gift of grace when I was in high school, and actually cared a lot about being cool.  At some point, the heavens parted, and I had a rare moment of clarity in which I realized that even in my small, private school, there were several different sub-groups that each had their own distinct version of what it meant to be cool, and they were seemingly only concerned about living up to their own groups’ versions of cool.  The punk kids didn’t try to be cool by surfers’ terms, and the preppies didn’t try to score style points with the band geeks.  In that moment of understanding, I saw that no matter how hard I tried, I’d never be cool with more than one or two of those sub-groups – being esteemed by everyone wasn’t going to be an option, so I might as well just pick a group to identify with, and be o.k. with that.

O.k., so that was a bit more soul-searching than I intended when I first started this post.  My main point is to give you, my friends, a glimpse into the depths of the uncoolness that is Steve.  Mock me at will for the following list.  I will return to the list periodically to add to my shame.  If you would like to join pathetic little me and admit to some of your coolness shortcomings, I promise not to tease you too badly . . . until I take this list viral on one of those Facebook meme thingies.  O.k., begin:

Books I’ve never read: Tom Sawyer/Huckleberry Finn, anything by Steinbeck, Blue Like Jazz, anything by Ann Lamott, anything by Dostoevsky or Tolstoy, any of the Harry Potter books.

Movies I’ve never seen: Ummm, practically anything in the past five years.  But beyond that: Cassablanca, Scarface, any of the Rocky movies, Driving Miss Daisy, Zoolander, Reality Bites, The Color Purple, anything with Miley Cyrus, Dirty Harry, When Harry Met Sally.

TV shows I’ve never seen an entire episode of: South Park, Desperate Housewives, Bones, Grey’s Anatomy, CSI: Miami, Anderson Cooper 360, Arrested Development, Walker Texas Ranger.

Apparently famous people I wouldn’t be able to pick out of a police lineup: Carmello Anthony, last year’s American Idol winner (I don’t even know who won), Soulja Boy (did I even spell that right?), R. Kelly, anyone in Pantera, Slayer, or Boyz II Men; Kanye West, Kate Hudson.

Musicians I wouldn’t be able to identify if I heard their songs (I’ve heard their names, and maybe their music, but not necessarily in the same place at the same time): Rascal Flatts, John Legend, Sigur Ros, Taylor Swift, Iron and Wine, Ciara, Diana Krall.

Hopefully you can tell that I’ve tried to be eclectic in my lameness.  I’d be happy to respond to pop quizzes, if you would like to further my embarrassment.  Go ahead, fire away!

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